Positively horrible.

Dad: "I think this is the slow road through Furth."
Me: "Well, now we can say we've been to Furth."
Dad: "True, but it's not the Furth place I would have picked to visit."
Me: "Groan. That was horrible. You're walking back to Rothenburg from here."
Dad: "No, no! Write that one down!"

Mission: Probably Possible

Me: "How are we going to get our wheat from the field at Waterloo home? Isn't Customs Canada on the lookout for this kind of thing?"
Dad: "I'm going to put it in the same bag as a minature broom we bought."
Me: "Ahhh, that's deviously sneeky."
Dad: "Phhh... this isn't the first time I've smuggled something...."

Grampa Simpson in the house

Dad: "Did I ever tell you about the time I met the Grand Duke of Luxemburg?"
Me: "NO!" [Beat. Beat. Beat.] "But do tell."
Dad: "Montreal. Winter of 1976. I was there working Olympic security..." [At which point, the story becames a little long winded - short version: he was posted as sentry for a press conference by the IOC President and Vice Presidents - the VPs were the Grand Dukes of Lichtenstein and Luxemburg.] ".... and then he shook my hand. I doubt it if he'd remember me."
Me: "Good call."

An MA in Obviously.

Dad: "Hun. I wonder what the French call the Battle of Waterloo?"
Me: "A resounding defeat? Hoy-Yo!"
Dad: "Un-hun."
Me: "Aw."

Fussen about

Me: "Man, I really wanted something with Fussen's town crest on it."
Dad: "I saw a bunch of flags with it - but they were on buildings."
Me: "Well, you're the flag cat-burgler - care to come back later tonight and nab me one?"
Dad: "Well, obviously I wasn't a very good flag theif."

von Trappin' it up.

Dad: "Hun. That was the least spectacular boarder crossing I could have expected. Well, do you feel like you're in Austria now?"
Me: "Nope. But wasn't that kindda' Hitler's point?"
Dad: "True enough."

Booooooo-urns.

In Hexenloch:

Dad: "I'm keeping my eyes up-towards the hills looking for anything un-towards coming at us."
Me: "That was just awesomely horrible."

Awkward...

Dad: "Look at how the front doors of those homes open right on to the main street."
Me: "So, not a kid-friendly type of town? I guess that means the parent only have to raise the smart ones."
Dad: "Do you really want to say something like that in the Father Land, with its history of selective breeding?"
Me: "Oops."

Muppet-piece theater

Dad: "I don't really need a hair cut right now, but I'll get one any way since it's gonna look pretty shaggy in a couple of weeks."
Me: "Good plan. I didn't NEED an eyebrow wax, but in about a week, I was gonna start looking like a muppet again."
Dad: "Aw, I like muppets."*

*Ah, loving acceptance.

TLC, Stat!

Me: I was wondering how pissed you would be if I rolled up to the airport with a pillow.
Dad: I guess that means you're going to have to pack your teddy bear?
Me: No, he can't come - he's getting to old and I'm affraid he'll fall apart.
Dad: You should see if CHEO still does the teddy-bear hospitals.
Me: What, and godzilla-stomp the little kids to get him better?
Dad: Exactly.

All grown up

Ring, ring.

Dad: "Hello?"
Me: "Hey - how's it going?"
Dad: "Good."
Me: "Is mom home?"
Dad: "Yes. [Beat] She let me answer the phone this time."
Me: "Ooooo.... like a big boy!"
Dad: "Yup!"